It's the classic gags that keep people laughing time after time, and Nick Harris has collected together a bumper batch of the best jokes that are guaranteed to have anyone rolling in the aisles. With jokes ranging from the classic subjects (man walks into a bar, an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman, marriage and divorce and more) to laugh-a-minute one-liners and the downright surreal, there is a wealth of hilarious subject matter to keep readers entertained. This is the perfect stocking filler for anyone that loves a good old laugh.
In more than 100 interviews, children and young adults reveal their personal tips and tactics for honing the creative benefits of dyslexia, enabling them to thrive in school and beyond. Strategies include ways to develop confidence and self-belief. The contributors have outlined specific approaches they feel have helped them, and others that haven't. The book contains stunning illustrations by 8-18 year olds with dyslexia. The first-hand accounts are inspiring in the way they normalise dyslexia and reveal the many success stories. There is an additional section for professionals who work in education or special learning environments, with advice given by school students themselves.
Did you hear the one about the bartender and the rabbi? If not, you'll find it in this delightful book along with hundreds of other jokes and funny stories about the denizens of bars, pubs, and watering holes everywhere. Featuring classic stories and wisecracks along with brand-new jokes, A Guy Walks Into a Bar will reduce you, your friends, and your family to tears of laughter. Michael Lewis has gathered a wide range of the very best and funniest bar jokes, riddles, anecdotes, and quotations in this rib-tickling (and thirst-inducing) collection. Sure to be a favorite of tipplers of all stripes and the teetotalers who drive them home, the book also includes bar bets, games, tricks, trivia, and more. Featuring classic "bartoons" at the opening of each chapter, A Guy Walks Into a Bar is the perfect party takealong or barside companion, deserving pride of place next to your cocktail shaker and jar of olives.
Albert Howard Carter III, a literary scholar, presents and analyzes humor on medical topics inside and outside of the hospital; he argues that comedy can be a form of preventive medicine and should routinely be an adjunct to medical care.
Koos is sitting in a bar. Each time he orders a drink he takes out his wallet, removes a photograph and stares at it. ‘Who’s the photo of?’ asks the barman, serving Koos his eighth Klippies and Coke. ‘My wife. When she starts to look pretty I’ll know I’ve had enough.’ What’s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead rugby referee in the road? There are skid marks in front of the dog. WARNING: Not for the faint-hearted or Mother Grundys of this world! Politically incorrect, irreverent and laugh-out-loud funny, The Big Fat South African Joke Book covers a range of topics close to every South African’s heart: from Patricia Lewis to Robert Mugabe; from rugby referees to Kamp Staaldraad; from picking up chicks to marriage; from infidelity to divorce; from Little Bongani to Little Koos and Little Gertruide; from school days to Varsity; and from the mouth of babes to the Pearly Gates of Heaven. These and many other jokes will tickle your funny bone and keep you chuckling for hours.
Bars (Drinking establishments) by Nicholas Pashley
The Pretty Good Joke Book includes all of the jokes from the first nine Prairie Home Companion Joke Shows--hundreds of jokes about every subject from blondes to lawyers to chickens to relationships. From one-liners and puns to jokes about the headlines, this book covers the field. Guys walk into bars, light bulbs get changed, doors are knocked on, and insults fly in this treasury of hilarity from one of America's favorite radio shows, audience-tested and certified Pretty Good.
A writer's reference by a New York Times editor shares fifty strategies for writing successful nonfiction narratives, in a lighthearted guide that draws on real-world examples and incorporates tales from his work in the newsroom. 30,000 first printing.
Nick Harris has collected together some of the greatest jokes, gags and one-liners, which will have you laughing your socks off all day. If you're in need of a pick-me-up after a hard day at work, or if you want to arm yourself with a few jokes with which to wow your friends, then look no further than this bountiful compilation of funnies.
Shortlisted for the CILIP Carnegie Medal 2015 Hilariously touching and outrageously unforgettable: Mark Haddon's Christopher Boone meets Holden Caulfield on one *#@! of a journey. . . Dylan Mint has Tourette's. Being sixteen is hard enough, but Dylan's life is a constant battle to keep the bad stuff in – the swearing, the tics, the howling dog that seems to escape whenever he gets stressed... But a routine visit to the hospital changes everything. Overhearing a hushed conversation between the doctor and his mother, Dylan discovers that he's going to die next March. So he grants himself three parting wishes or 'Cool Things To Do Before I Cack It'. But as Dylan sets out to make his wishes come true, he discovers that nothing – and no-one – is quite as he had previously supposed.
From the legendary literary master, winner of the National Book Award and New York Times bestselling author Joyce Carol Oates, a collection of thirteen mesmerizing stories that maps the eerie darkness within us all. Insightful, disturbing, imaginative, and breathtaking in their lyrical precision, the stories in Lovely, Dark, Deep display Joyce Carol Oates’s magnificent ability to make visceral the terror, hurt, and uncertainty that lurks at the edges of ordinary lives. In “Mastiff,” a woman and a man are joined in an erotic bond forged out of terror and gratitude. “Sex with Camel” explores how a sixteen-year-old boy realizes the depth of his love for his grandmother—and how vulnerable those feelings make him. Fearful that that her husband is “disappearing” from their life, a woman becomes obsessed with keeping him in her sight in “The Disappearing.” “A Book of Martyrs” reveals how the end of a pregnancy brings with it the end of a relationship. And in the title story, the elderly Robert Frost is visited by an interviewer, an unsettling young woman, who seems to know a good deal more about his life than she should. A piercing and evocative collection, Lovely, Dark, Deep reveals an artist at the height of her creative power.
'Messages' is the result of a writing collaboration between Lynne Rees and Sarah Salway. Ranging from the moving to the playful, the themes of love, sex, life, death and chocolate take their place in this book of 300 pieces of 300 words.
Did you hear the one about the horse that walks into a bar? The likely answer to this is 'yes', but regardless, it's the classic gags that keep people laughing time after time. An Englishman, An Irishman and a Scotsman. . . is a fantastic celebration of all those rib-tickling and thigh-slapping jokes we have come to love over the years, together with some brand new material that will have people rolling in the aisles. Jokes range from the classic subjects of: . The mother-in-law . The actress and the bishop . An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman . 'Knock, Knock' . 'Light-bulb'. Also containing laugh-a-minute one-liners, silly gags and the downright surreal, Nick Harris has collected together a bumper batch of fun to warm the cockles and raise a smile.
My mate told me that I just don’t understand irony. Which was ironic because we were at a bus stop at the time. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. An onion just told me a joke. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. A priest, a rabbi and a blind man walk into a bar and the bartender says, ‘What is this, some kind of joke?’ I got chatting to a lumberjack in a pub. He seemed like a decent feller. I’ll never forget what my granddad said to me just before he kicked the bucket. He said, ‘Grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?’ Whether told in the rugby clubs of Wales or the gentlemen’s clubs of London, their sharpness and simplicity unites us all. Short, sweet and wickedly clever, they hold a special place in the annals of comedy, and as the Twitter age heralds a resurrection of the art form, there seems no better time to celebrate the immortal one-liner. In this riveting read, Times diary columnist Grant Tucker does just that, bringing together 5,000 of the funniest one-liners ever told in one definitive volume. Laugh-out-loud funny, 5,000 Great One-Liners has all the quips, zingers, puns and wisecracks you’ll ever need - and a whole lot more.
When you're feeling disappointed or just a little blue, there's nothing like good a laugh at some groan-worthy jokes to raise the spirits--and that's what you'll get with this whopping compendium. With all-time classic subjects such as bankers, the battle of the sexes, and Doctor, Doctor, as well as fun wordplay and one-liners, this bumper crop of mirth is guaranteed to turn that frown upside down!
Single mother, movie buff, and Manhattan D.A. employee Susan Given encounters more adventure than she ever hoped for when she stumbles on a connection between a CIA informant and a dead prostitute. A first novel.
A host of hilarious one-liners and observations told in the always-unique words of the very young Look, it's raining through that boy's trousers! Can we get something to eat? I'm vanished! Children have a unique way of looking at the world—they can be wonderfully innocent, or world weary beyond their years. This book collects the craziest and the funniest stuff that kids say in one hilarious volume, and with topics ranging from "Love and Stuff" to their take on the old, it's guaranteed to have you chuckling your socks off.