Isn't she gorgeous? Hardly been ridden. She's been in the garage just gathering dust. Becky's pregnant and frustrated. But her husband is more interested in the baby manual than her new underwear, so she turns to the porn stash under the bed. As the summer heats up, a brief encounter sends her speeding downhill towards reckless abandon. A provocative and darkly comic look at fantasy and romance, The Village Bike by Penelope Skinner premiered at the Royal Court Theatre, London, in June 2011. Penelope Skinner won the George Devine Award for Most Promising Playwright 2011.
Where else can mountain bikers complement a day's bike ride with a dizzying glissade down a mid-August snowfield? Where else can they descend nearly 40 miles through five biogeographical zones? Where else can they catch a major league game and be ripping along rocky singletrack 30 minutes later? Colorado, that's where. Snow in August, lighting above timberline, and 100 degree desert temperatures are all to be expected in the sport of Colorado mountain biking. As the country's highest state, Colorado offers its mountain bikers a unique perspective into the sport and raises the bar for all who ride. Under the expert guidance of local cyclist Stephen Hlawaty, come admire the beauty and revere the majesty that is Colorado. From this newly revised book, cyclists can expect exhaustive and comprehensive trail descriptions of more than 50 of the state's greatest mountain bike adventures, from beginner to advanced. Included are GPS-quality, digitally designed relief maps, and accurate route profiles showing the ups and downs of each ride. In addition, detailed directions get cyclists to the ride without getting them lost. Detailed mile-by-mile directional cues are also provided with difficulty ratings, elevation gain, trail contacts, and much more. More than 60 photographs round out this book's presentation. It's not just a mountain bike guide to Colorado. It's a guide to Colorado by mountain bike.
What could be worse than being stuck in an office all day? Meetings, deadlines... colleagues. Surely no torture can crush the spirit so completely as prolonged exposure to these people. You?ve faked phone calls to avoid them. You?ve hidden in toilet cubicles until they?ve gone away. At last there?s an effective way to fight back. Pains in the Office will help you identify, shun and plan your revenge on the 50 worst types of people you meet at work. Your job may be awful, you may hate your colleagues with a passion, but here at least is a happy place to retreat into. This is your comfort blanket, hidey-hole and fire escape all rolled into one. Pains in the Office is guaranteed to become as indispensable to the office worker as cigarette breaks and free stationery. It?s the perfect antidote to nightmarish co-workers everywhere!
Do you like shopping? John does. When Janet and John go to the big department store, Janet says, 'I'm going to have a look around the kitchen department. I'll see you back here in half an hour.' Janet has bought some new kitchen scissors. Janet says, 'Have you been a good boy?' 'Yes,' says John. 'I saw Mrs. Llewellyn. She was complaining that her husband wasn't very well served in the trouser department and said that I looked like a man who knew how to treat a lady properly. After that I saw Mrs. Steward. She said she was always on the lookout for a partner with good ballroom and asked if I'd like to come to her special club and learn how to Mazurka'. Do you know how to get scissors out of plastic packaging in under a second? Janet does. See Janet chase John. Run John, run. During its transmission, 8 million listeners to BBC Radio 2's Wake Up To Wogan were beguiled and bewitched by the naughty but nice adventures of John and his wife Janet. As a favourite segment, the stories moved with Terry Wogan to his Sunday morning show, Weekend Wogan. In the style of children's stories of yesteryear, John gets up to all sorts. Then he tells Janet all about his day, by which time every perfectly innocent big end, back passage and stiff one acquires a whole new meaning. This second instalment promises even more devilish double entendres, with over seventy new stories to tickle your funny bones.
MICROSOFT VISUAL BASIC 2012: COMPREHENSIVE teaches students the essentials of computer programming using the latest Visual Basic programming language, Visual Basic 2012. Twelve chapters and four appendices cover topics such as designing a Visual Basic user interface, creating a windows application, variables and arithmetic operations, mobile applications using decision structures, loop structures, Visual Studio tools for Office applications, arrays, function procedures and exception handling, incorporating databases with ADO.NET 3.5, creating classes, and cell phone applications and Web services. Written in a straight-forward style with the innovative Guided Program Development section in each chapter, this text makes it easy for any novice programmer to understand the core capabilities and fundamental skills and techniques for Visual Basic 2012. Important Notice: Media content referenced within the product description or the product text may not be available in the ebook version.
Prior to 1956, the area now known as Elk Grove Village was a massive cornfield. On July 17, 1956, Elk Grove Village was incorporated as a village, with a population of 116. Since that time, the growth of the village can only be described as phenomenal. Over 50 years, the village has dramatically changed since those early days of cornfields. The name Elk Grove Village was adopted from the great number of elk that roamed through the fenced-in portion of Busse Woods, along Arlington Heights Road, south of the Northwest Tollway. American Indians called the region Wapiti, meaning "elk."
A Bike Ride through My Life chronicles the life of author Frank Clements with bicyclesfollowing the twists and turns that his life has taken in pursuit of his passion for riding. Clements is the younger brother of Ernie Clements, winner of several British Cycling Championships and a Silver Medal in the 1948 Olympic Games Bicycle Race. Despite his love of cycling, he first chose to join National Service in the RAF to establish a unique place for himselfand spent virtually all of his final twelve months of service riding a bike. After his tour of duty ended, he began training to become the best cyclist in the world, his lifes ambition since his success as a potential world class cyclist as a teen. Clements has had many ups and downs in his cycling life. At a young age, he came in second in the British under-eighteen championships and just missed being a member of the British Olympic Cycling team for the 1956 Olympics in Melbourne, Australia. He also designed, built, and loaned five special Cross country bikes to Roger Hammond and he won the Worlds Cyclo Cross Championship with them. This memoir follows Clements from youth to retirement, offering a fascinating trip through an amazing life.
Leo rides his beloved red bicycle to school, soccer practice and everywhere in between. He is devastated when he outgrows Big Red. But when Leo learns of a bicycle donation program, he perks up - someone who really needs his bike can give it a new life. Little does he know that Big Red will change other people's lives, too. Follow the bike as it travels to West Africa, where it helps people in Burkina Faso bring goods to the market, and serves as a makeshift ambulance, proving that an ordinary bicycle can be truly extraordinary.
Book One: Young Nate is on a foreign exchange assignment to stay with a family in an ancient castle in western Germany. As he eagerly learns to adapt to the culture, Nate is befriended by neighboring Germans, Thorston and Sandra, who together discover there is something terribly wrong in the castle and the surrounding farming village of Gauersheim. Book Two: Nate Brighton returns home to America and soon departs with his Christian education/missionary family for the island of Okinawa, Japan. Once settled into this foreign but astonishingly eventful place, Nate and his younger brother and friends set off for a camping trip at the ruins of Nakagusuku Castle. Book Three: It is one thing to talk about protecting the environment, but it’s an entirely different thing to stand up and do something about it. The Connor boys, as you will see, are up for such a task. Nate and Ricky’s parents send them home to Washington State from Okinawa, Japan, to stay in their home under the guardianship of their Uncle Hank and prepare for a new school year.
Scenes We’d Like to See is the very first Mock the Week book, published to coincide with the sixth series of the hit BBC2 comedy show. From gloriously rude ‘Unfortunate names for race horses’ to ‘Unlikely personal ads’ and lines that (sadly) never appeared in the Harry Potter books, Mock the Week: Scenes We’d Like to See is the fastest, funniest read of the year: a bumper book of all-new razor-sharp one-liners, including: UNLIKELY MEDICAL LABELS: No rabbits were harmed during the testing of this product – but the rats were less lucky. GREETINGS CARDS THAT WOULDN’T SELL: Happy New Breasts! UNLIKELY HOROSCOPES: You will go to your bedroom window and stand there naked for a minute, you will do this especially if your name is Mrs Hughes and you live at 56, The Avenue, Clapham...around 3.30 would be best for me. UNLIKELY LINES FROM A NEW HARRY POTTER BOOK: 'I’ve turned my cock into a frog!' squealed Ron in terror.